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My Plan For Winning The Religious War (Jihad)

It is obvious that now we are engaged in a great world religious war with Muslim fanatics. Their motto is, "Be Muslim or die," so we are at war whether we like it or not.

My plan for winning this war is: First, take the war to the enemy. We have to act, not react; we have to have an offense, not just a defense. (That's why I get queasy in the stomach when I hear continual talk about, "Are we safer today?" We need to strike the enemy, to defeat him -- not huddle down and try to be "safer.")

So I would fight the jihadists wherever we can find them. They don't hold terrorist conventions, so we have to take the next-best target: bomb the training camps, regardless of what country they're in. And bomb the madrassas, those incubators and vipers' nurseries for future jihadists. (Personally, I would have hit those targets before getting all het up over Iraq. Who wants to adopt that problem child? And how do you "win" a war between two OTHER parties -- the Sunnis and the Shite-pokes, or whatever their name is?)

And second, don't let them into this country! Do we have such a crying need for a few million medieval heathens that we have to import them, only to try to figure out later which ones want to kill us? If we don't let them in, we don't have to argue with them constantly and try to protect ourselves from them! (Countries like Great Britain, Holland and France, that already have a critical mass of such people, parasites who despise their host country, are pretty much S.O.L. already.)

Muslims are not of our religion, they don't share our values, they despise this country and they're just a fifth column for weakening our resolve to maintain our identity. (I'll write later about our Mexican invaders!) Keep them out, and we can concentrate on fighting the external, ravening blood-thirsty totalitarians.

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"Homicide Bombers"-- duhhh!

The announcers or "news readers" on Fox News persist in using the term  "homicide bomber." I just heard some reporter-ette use it again, today,  Aug. 15.

I appreciate their indignation but, how infantile can they be? All bombers are "homicide" bombers, for Pete's sake.

That is, the "homicide" part is included in the meaning of the word "bombers." That's what a bombing is all about -- homicide. If you want to modify "bomber" with an adjective, it's supposed to QUALIFY the noun, i.e., it's supposed to identify a particluar type of bomber.

For instance, you might say "suicide bomber" (a bomber who kills himself as well -- not all bombers do that). Or you might say "car bomber"  -- a method not all bombers use. Or a "mad bomber" -- not all bombers are crazy.  You don't say "explosion bomber" or "homicide bomber," because  that doesn't narrow "bomber" down at all.

Similarly, you might say "a cat burglar" or "a home burglar"  --  you don't say "a stealing burglar" or "a theft burglar." Well, maybe the dimwits at Fox do,  but it's an illiterate use of the English language.
 
 
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"Do you want your change?"

A "cultural" matter in the area of Media and Culture:

What's with the habit waiters & waitresses have nowadays, when I pay the bill,  of saying "Do you want your change?"  It sounds bizarre to my ears; nobody asks me that when I pay at the Convenient store or at WalMart. So why is the waitress saying, "Do you want your change?"

Oh, I really know why. It's their way of saying, "Since you're too stupid and cheap to tip decently, I'd better remind you and nudge you a little now." Quel chutzpah!

If it's their way of pressuring me, that's arrogant. If it's simple begging, that's undignified.

Here's the way the transaction works among civilized people: You (Mr. Waiter) proffer the check. I give you an amount of money sufficient to cover it. You return the excess to me (the "change"), and I leave what I consider an appropriate tip. No strong-arming, hectoring, nagging or bullying is required, or acceptable.

All you restaurant patrons out there, help me nip this in the bud, or the next thing you know, waiters & waitresses will be asking, "Are you going to finish your fries?"

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